Fruit

There are many moments during one's childhood that make such an impression that they are remembered for a lifetime. These are the moments that we use to learn, to grow, and most importantly to laugh. :) I've had several of those that make me cringe, "What was I thinking? Certainly that wasn't me!" My mother can confirm, however, that there was in fact a scrubbed down milk tin found in the nearby cow pasture creek given to her by her oldest 6th grade daughter as an anniversary gift.  Yes, cringe. Again I ask myself "What was I thinking?!" It's the thought that counts. :)

Another such memory is less embarrassing and simply shocking to the mind of a ten year old. My sister had a "male" cat named Oreo. Now, we have always loved our animals dearly but they are just that: animals. I will never forget the day I walked outside and was stunted by what I saw; I ran back in a panic. "Mom, Oreo is nursing some cat's kittens!!!" I was smart you see; I knew that boy cats don't have kittens so certainly Oreo kidnapped these poor babies. But no, the shock was not over; I soon learned that Oreo was in fact a mother. Boy cats do not nurse; he was a girl!

Matthew 7:16: You shall know them by their fruits.

All this time we had been fooled into thinking Oreo was a boy; however, when it was all said and done her true self was revealed. Having kittens did not make Oreo a girl. Just the opposite is true. Because she was a girl, she was able to have kittens. The same can be said of Christians. Yearning for God's Word and growth, loving and serving others, being faithful to God and His commandments do not make us Christians. However, as Christians this is how we will act. Just like the kittens made us realize Oreo's true self, a person's desires and priorities can give us a hint to his/her true identity. How can a true believer not want to make time with the Lord part of their daily walk? How can a Christian feel no remorse for sin, apathy, or unfaithfulness? We are still humans; we will mess up daily! But someone who has a relationship with the Lord feels that tug and discomfort that comes from knowing their actions/thoughts/words do not please God. 

Matthew 7:21-23: Not everyone who says to me, "Lord, Lord" will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only he who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day, "Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in Your Name, and in Your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?" Then I will tell the plainly, "I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!"


 What is your lifestyle? Yes, Christianity affects your entire life. Are you characterized as a person who is angry, mean, selfish? Are you preoccupied with sports, academics, or even your family? How are you raising your children? Do they put sports, friends, and fun over Bible study and their relationship with the Lord? Yes, even children can have a walk with God, and they do show fruit! Or do people see something different in you? 


Galatians 5:22-23: But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

A Life to Be Emulated

At one point in my childhood years my dad was a college pastor. And let me tell you, I was the luckiest little kid on the planet: nonstop attention from cool college kids! One in particular was a girl who would take us on excursions around Athens; she earned the right to have my childhood dog named after her. And when she asked me to be her flower girl, I was on cloud nine! Since then, we have been able to keep in touch through all the moves and life changes. Now I have enjoyed getting to know her three fun-loving girls while still being fortunate enough to have her as an example of a Godly wife and mother.

And that is what the Christian walk should look like: encouraging one another. Titus 2 explains it well:

^"3Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. ⁴Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, ⁵to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God."

That whole "train younger women" doesn't have to be a literal class or "how-to" discussion (and rarely is!). It is about providing a physical example of the Proverbs 31 woman; a lifestyle that younger women can safely emulate and know they are becoming more like Christ. And honestly, you never know who you may impacting. That middle school girl who seems to want nothing to do with you may actually be watching you like a hawk. There have been countless times that I have found myself thinking, "How would Wendy/Mom/Karen.... respond in this situation?" Or maybe the more frequent convictions after the fact: "She would never have responded like that." And each woman as someone looking up to her. The middle school girl has her little sister following her foot steps; the college girl has high schoolers watching her every move. Who is watching you??

Paul said in 1 Corinthians 11:1, "Follow me as I follow Christ." Can you say that about your life?

Life is good?

My aunt has always been a huge proponent of personality types, and thus I have become a huge fan. It fascinates me how one little test can explain so much about a person. I can't tell you how many "ah ha!" moments I have had at her house while discussing this topic. "So that is why she does that!" More recently this cure-all test has been applied to my husband and I. Admittedly, I am into this a good bit more than my husband; however, as the days go by living with his melancholy-choleric I can see he is slowly buying into the idea. I keep life exciting for my sanguine-phlegmatic! Yes it's true, we are complete opposites. Though as a good choleric, I would argue he has a hint of choleric in him as well. Back to my point....

Being a "scholar of the types" I would call my new home town phlegmatic-phlegmatic. Life is very laid back, slow, and fun. Oh to be a phlegmatic! I envy their "easygoing-ness". Contrary to my title, life for a melancholy is not always good. Wikipedia defines melancholy as "the mental type, live by-the-book." An example of this is my car accident in high school. At a stop sign, I stopped at the white line. Going past the line would be breaking the rules, so heaven forbid I pull up past the bush on my left to see if a car is coming.  Sure enough, just behind the bush was a Yukon. Suddenly, that rule about stopping at the white line didn't seem so important.

A list of melancholy character traits includes "sensitive, unsociable, moody, perfectionist, melancholy." The last part of that definition is the part that's  real bummer....literally! We melancholies tend to feel things very deeply. So, life can be a bit of a roller coaster. Needless to say, these past few months have been full of change and uncertainty. Sometimes life does not feel so good.

I've heard more often than once lately "Just trust God! He is in control." But do my feelings of depression really mean I am not trusting God? I struggled with this thought for a while. I am trying the best I know how to trust God; in my head I know He has a perfect plan and I honestly am excited about it; I am faithful to spend time with Him. So why do I still have feelings of discouragement? Why am I not always "high on life" like my wonderful sanguine-phlegmatic? Because that is not how God made me. Through my studies, I have been reminded of the many accounts that God simply asks for pure honesty. The Kaph section of Psalm 119 (verses 81-88) is the Psalmist begging for comfort; Job poured out his heart and his negative emotions to God; Ecclesiastes is full of Solomon's despair.

God will bring us through rough times. He does not ask us to feel good about it; He simply asks us to rely on Him for strength. When we don't understand or when we think life is spinning in a downward cycle, we can find peace in His Word. Our true trust is found in where we turn when the darkness seems overwhelming. Jesus Himself asked for relief before His crucifixion. "But not My will, but Thine be done."

Let me backtrack a moment to look on the positive side (a big step for this personality type, I know!). I said earlier that God has given each person their personalities for a reason. You are probably convinced that mine is just awful. There are positives and negatives to each type! Because of our deep ability to feel things, we are able to relate to people on a deep level. You can usually tell what we are thinking, if not by what we say, by the look on our faces, so we can't help but be open. We are very loyal and will do what it takes to get a job done. So for all my fellow melancholies out there, look on the bright side! God is using us in unique ways. Look to your true source of peace, and when those dark days come buckle down and focus on the Truth.

Psalm 119:103- "How sweet are Your Words to my taste! Yes, sweeter than honey to my mouth!"

Count Your Blessings

 1 Chronicles 16:34- Give thanks to the LORD for He is good; His love endures forever.

*in no particular order

1. My Husband:
He always enjoys having fun. He includes me in his ministry work here, and provides for me (jobless) with no complaint.
2.My Dad:
He is a great example of self-sacrificing. He always stands up forwhat is right and for what God has called him to do.
3.  My Mom:
She is more concerned about the welfare of others than that of herself. She is always ready to listen and provide encouragement.

4. My sisters Emily and Kelsey:
They are both so much fun and always know how to have a good time! They are always ready to listen and encourage, each in her own way.
5. My brothers Christopher and Caleb:
They are both very committed to their ministries. Like my Dad, they are very self-less and always look for opportunities to serve others.
6. My friend Amanda Johnson:
Though we have only been friends for a few months, she has been one of most encouraging friends I've ever had. She is always ready to listen and provide honest advise. She encourages me with honesty about her own openess.
7.  My friend Rebecca Hager:
She has been my loyal friend since birth! I can always count on Rebecca to be there for me. Seriously, she's been there through the thick and thin!
8. My In-Laws:
They are all very supportive and very generous. They are all ready at a moments notice to help with anything.
9.  My chihuahua and kitten:
They give me loyal company and entertainment while at home! Seriously, I can't walk to another room without a small parade behind me. Ha!
10. God's Word:
What a comfort it brings! God's Word is the guidebook for life. It provides encouragement for the  Christians and convictions for the sinner.


There is sooo much more to be thankful for but that would take days!! Take the challenge and make note of things you are most thankful for. Notice how God has blessed you! The relief and comfort that comes is well worth the time.

Redecorating

I believe I have "redecorated" our home about fifty times since moving in the end of July. While watching the kitten and chihuahua play (more of the hyperactive kitten "playing" with the independent chihuahua), I am suddenly horrified at the sight of a misplaced picture, or a couch that is clearly on the wrong wall completely. I don't know if it's perfectionism or pure boredom; whatever it is, my living room has had many facelifts. And, oh, the cleaning. Well, with the two aforementioned pieces of entertainment also known as Sosa the loyal chihuahua and Aubri the playful kitten, there is plenty of dusting and vacuuming to be done. Never a lack of laundry and kitchen and bathroom cleaning in our household, yet with no job and no human children (yes I consider Sosa and Aubri my babies), there is plenty of time to practice keeping house. My clean house is a very deceptive guise for "good house keeping skills". Those have yet to be proven, until I have to balance it with a full schedule. I am thankful for the time to master these skills for when I do have less time to devote to it.

Our women's ministry at church is currently doing a wonderful Bible study on personal revival. Admittedly, my "straight by the book", black-and-white personality was at first unsure about the idea. "Personal revival!? Where is that in the Bible?" Desperate for deep relationships in my new town, I decided to see what this was all about. And I am so glad God brought me there. Contrary to my simple minded ideas, personal revival is all over the Bible. Specifically we are looking at Hosea.  This week the author discussed humility, and boy did it get personal. This morning's lesson ended the week with a personal inventory. Let me sum it up by saying it was a very convicting experience. I have a lot of "redecorating" to do. It was as if I had been just doing the next thing, which happened to be the women's Bible study, fellowshipping with other women then "bam!" I am suddenly horrified with the sight of my sin.  How could I be so prideful?!? What do I even have to prideful about??!!  And wow, does pride affect everything! This can be very overwhelming and quite depressing. As Romans 7:15 says "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do, I do not do. But what I do not want to do, I do." Can you feel the frustration?!


Yet there is hope. Recently I have been studying through Psalm 119. The parallel between that and the revival study has been fascinating. (Remember, I am a housewife with only a dog and cat to take care of, so lots of time on my hands). While discovering my faults and struggles in the Bible study, the psalmist provides hope.  Section Beth (v9-16) gives an explanation of how someone can keep the law: by treasuring His Word. Daleth (v25-32) has been my personal favorite thus far. The Psalmist is clearly confronted with his depravity and is yearning for revival. Yes, in verse 25 NASB uses the word "revive" is used. Silly me, revival is in the Bible. "My soul cleaves to the dust; (possibly the feelings we goes through when fully confronted with our sin) revive me according to Your Word."  So where do you find the guide to "housekeeping"? God's Word. Verse 31: "I cling to You testimonies." Cling! This is the same word for your belt clinging to your waist. That's pretty tight (sometimes tighter than others!). :)  Who or what do we cling to when confronted with sin? The true relief is found in God's Word and none other. 


As long as we are on this earth, there will be plenty of housekeeping and redecorating to be done. But thank God, He has given us the Guide!

Driving Through the Country

Let me begin by saying this: driving in the country is not the same as driving in the city. Not even close. In fact, I think they should offer a class when transitioning from metro to rural or vice-versa. For example, a long road in south Georgia is NOT the same as that in the city. In the city, a long road is generally an interstate or highway, therefore the speed limit ranges from 55-75 mph. This is not the case in rural towns. A long straight road is just that: a long. straight. road. The speed limit ranges from 25-55mph. I can only think of one explanation, and this goes back to the idea of a "drive through the country." It means driving very slowly through the middle of nowhere, so as to take in the scenery.  The "slowly" part is mandated by speed limits posted by the proud officials of that locale. It'd be a shame for a passer-by to miss part of the town while driving through. Don't get me wrong: driving in rural Georgia is quite interesting and has much more country-side to see than that of the big city. However, this type of driving is nowhere to be found in my personality description. When I get behind the wheel of a car, I do so because I have a destination. The "fun" part of driving is getting to the destination. This has become even more true as my city driving now stands out like a sore thumb to law enforcement in south Georgia with roads to pay for. I'm sure I own an entire highway somewhere by now. Since my first abode in south Georgia 6 years ago, I have learned to hate driving. And every single ticket has been in rural Georgia. No lie. I'm sure there are a few who sympathize with my distain for driving, as well as those who have yet to feel that drop in the stomach at the site of blue lights in the rear-view.

But this goal-driven attitude affects more than just my driving. Why is it so hard for me to enjoy the ride of life? "Oh I'll be settled once I graduate. Then I can have a ministry." Or "If only I could live in a big city. Then I would truely be happy." How much time have I lost by being focused on the goal and ignoring the signs around me, the needs around me? My ministry may not look like my "goal" but it is actually more valuable because it isn't my plan. Therefore, anything that happens cannot be credited to any accomplishments or goals that I have pushed myself to meet. Only God knows the things that will be accomplished along the way.  

 Proverbs 31:12, "She does him good and not evil all the days of her life." Did you notice the end of that verse? "All the days of her life." Not once she gets her white house with the picket fence; not once she gets her phD, or her dream career. Every single day she does the good things listed in the rest of the chapter.

This "slowing down and enjoying the ride" thing seems impossible and overwhelming to this goal-oriented chick, but sanctification is a process that Christ does in us. Philippians 4:12-14: all things are possible through Christ. So, while I learn to sit back and enjoy the ride (literally and figuratively), He is able to conform me to His image, and I am able to notice my surroundings. How exciting!

Where True Peace is Found

Most people have a picture of what their life will one day look like. It may not even be a "dream" per say, such as living in  multi-million dollar house on beach, but there is a plan. Especially for us type A super-planners. Yet I hope by the end of this post, you will see  that true peace is not found in fulfilling one's life goals.

My planned life: live in a big city, preferably Charlotte, Washington DC,  or maybe even San Diego. Work full-time as a middle school science or health teacher, one day becoming a missionary to Central America. Happily married to someone who works in the ministry. One dog and one cat, two kids. Eat very little meat and dairy. Daily exercise and a ministry I can be involved in, both growing and serving.


Being an extreme introvert, hanging out with people for extended periods of time drains my energy. Don't get me wrong; I LOVE hanging out with friends, but I "recharge" by being alone. However, contrary to popular belief, I despise being alone. Weird, right? While I can't speak for other introverts, I enjoy being in crowds of people: people I don't know. During graduate school my "recharge station" was the mall, more specifically Barnes and Noble. Being a city with a population of 200,000, it was rare that I saw anyone I knew, yet I was never alone. There was no need to converse or entertain, yet there was the presence of other human beings. I would spend hours there in my energy dock. In undgrad, my station was Starbucks. It's an automatic response to extended periods of time with friends: head to the charger. You can see why I like the big city. You are never alone, and only see people you know if planned, preferably in one to two hour increments. It is my comfort zone. My husband is not an introvert....far from it. He loves interacting with people. He couldn't care less what or when he eats, but his "charging station" is hanging out with friends. They say opposites attract: we are living proof.

Yet I have found that being in my comfort zone may be the most dangerous place for me. I have "no need" to seek God's presence.

The population of my current town is 3,747. No, I didn't miss a zero. It's small. Ideal for an extrovert who thrives on interacting with people he knows. Yet this was not my plan, or my desire. After a long day of church or swimming lessons or parties, where do I "recharge"!? Where do I go to escape!?! And how am I supposed to be an example at the schools if I can't even get a job there? What will happen to my "perfect plans"? Panic sets in. Yet in that moment realizing my total loss of control, God's presence becomes know.

My plans, in and of themselves were not bad or "ungodly" at all. They were just that: my plans. But why worry about fulfilling my plans when God already has His plans in motion? Who am I to say that my plans are better than the Almighty Creator?! And what a peace that is found in letting go, and trusting God to ordain my steps. How exciting is it that He is letting me be part of His work here in the country! And there is so much work to be done. If I had started off with a full time job, with people I know, and a haven to recharge, I would have had no need to seek the Lord's presence. Yet in His presence is where peace and true purpose can be found. It took letting go and discomfort to find that.

In her book Keep a Quiet Heart Elisabeth Elliot wrote that she thought she'd live in Ecuador forever. But that was not God's plan. God does not call us to a life of wordly comfort where everything goes "according to plan", but quite the opposite. It is in the lifestyle of "discomfort" that peace is found. God has brought me where I am today, and I wouldn't want to be anywhere else.